-
› Stalker, meetings, and leftover pizza
Hello everyone! I hope you all are doing good! I’m currently in bed for the night, but I wanted to pop in here and say hello!
Today has been pretty hectic due to meetings at hospital, monthly grocery shopping within a time limit which was very stressful, repack food before putting in freeze box, study etc. it has been crazy today so now I’m finally in bed.
Today’s quick dinner while study; left over pizza. Yesh not healthy but it was something over from last night when M and son ate pizza (I always take chicken salad). *snapchat & filter*
Every class we get homework todo til next class and with my history of math etc, I struggle really hard.
●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●
Confession time; I am dead scared of going in school now and alone in town. Why? Because I have a massive stalker who goes to same school as me.
Back story; I’ve met this man three times. Once at a busstop, once in school and now the third time in town when I was in town with my bestfriend. He snook up behind me and said “Hi Emma!” and I always answer when people talk to me so I said Hi back. After that, it went down hill. E even tried to help me get away from this man and after a while which felt like years he left so we could walk away. I was crying, very uncomfortable, scared etc. This man has said he was COMING home to me, tried to kiss me, hug me, he touched me etc. More happened but this whole situation trigger me even when thinking of it (I’m shaking rn).
So my school situation right now is that my teacher know (I texted him the same night it happened, he called and we spoke), the boss over the principal knows and has spoken with all teachers so they all are keeping eyes on me. Which feels very wrong to be honest but I really appreciate it. Yet I am dead scared of going to school I even have classmates who ends the classes early to walk with me to the busstop. that’s crazy!
Long story short; I have school five days a week and I really don’t wanna go but still go.
●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●
I hope you all have an amazing day and remember this; you are fantastic and amazing. Never let anyone else tell you something else. Always.. always be true to yourself.
-
› 5 things I am grateful for
5 things I am grateful for is kinda hard to think out because I am grateful for so many things. All from my son, to my education, to my interests but I’ll try write five things and maybe in future I can write more. Lol!
●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●
please join this little challenge! It’s a fun challenge to share so we all get to know each other.
Note; do NOT share personal information, locations of your work/home/etc. Just be safe if you join this.
●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●Five things I am grateful for
● My son & family
I will forever be thankful / grateful for my son who’s a miracle. Growing up the doctors told me to give up my dream (to become a mother) because it would never happen because I’ve PCOS. Yet here I am. A mother for soon seven years. I’m thankful that I have made my own family. A lifepartner and son. My family.
● Education
Growing up I had hard time in school – bullying. No help from teachers or what so ever. But today I have an education – nurse assistant and I am currently studying my old grades up to I can become a preschool teacher. The nurseasssitant education was actually a promise to my mother before I died. She wanted my and my siblings to become a nurse so we would help people more than we did.
● Finding myself
I’m still working on myself and forever will but lately I have found myself a little bit. I’ve managed to get my real style out in public and not being hiding behind other clothes. I dyed my hair neon red again. I have managed to find focus and things to make myself feel better.
● Emma Santorini blog
I’m actually very very grateful for this blog. Even thought I haven’t been updating so much lately (I have posted like 80 posts since august). I’m grateful because I write my thoughts out. Write my life like a journal. Share photographs I’ve taken, ideas, and share my opinions of things.
● YOU!
I’m so grateful for you! Why? Because you are you! Never change for anyone. Never change yourself. I’m grateful because you are here. Life is hard but I’m here to help if you need someone to talk.●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●
What are you grateful for? -
› Goodmorning from the school bench
Goodmorning every single beautiful soul! I hope you all are doing good!
today is all about school for me. Math. It will haunt me in my dreams ~ haha. But hey, one step closer to my next goal.
what are your plans for today? I actually wanted to go to the gym but unfortunately I can’t because of school and the fact that my hip is hurting and to be honest, I think I’m getting sick so facemask on in school. I’m not sick but i feel it’s something in my body that’s off you know.. Åh, doesn’t matter.
I will blog more later
-
› Enormous pressure in school. Questioning my future.
teardrops from heaven.
●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●
as much as this blog will have a lot of photographs I have been taking I also will be sharing about my life and days. Like today my day was not good in school. I did a big exam in math and failed.
Math has always been a subject I always hated. I never got any help in school when I was younger and now iam in a class where I get a lot of help and actually learn math. That’s crazy! Back to the test, I tried hard. I doodled my calculations, I counted etc but yet I failed it. Luckily I can re-do it later. But it made the teach and I talk more about my past of school experiences etc. Let me just say that they were not good. We also spoke about my future, how the teacher will help me etc.
So after our talk, it got me thinking hard of my education. Iam already a nurse assistant but don’t wanna work on hospital etc anymore so I decided to study to become a preschool teacher. But here’s the problem, it’s in an other city and my husband has two jobs.. And we have E. So I must rethink my new carrier move.
I love teaching. I taught my husband swedish (fluently) both talking and writing on 6 months. I have easy to learn languages. I’ve learned sign language etc to communicate with my son when he can’t talk (he is non verbal but actually learning to say some words). And that’s how my thoughts of becoming a preschool teacher started.. I teach the children same as I teach my son. but like I said ..the education are in an other city and requires 5 days a week at school.
so now iam confused and lost. Should I give up this as I gave up my dreams to become a photographer for national geographic magazine.. as I have given up a dream carrier as a translator on arabic and spanish for embassies and governments (no education here in Sweden for that). what will my next move be?
tomorrow it’s time for math again. 12h a week in school.. only math. lovely. but tomorrow I will try attacking algebra and I’m scared.
-
› First day of school, painful | how it really went
so my first day of school is done. Woho. Painful but I made it. Right now I’m studying math and for me that’s an massive headache (which I got when i was counting, drawing, calculation etc). So sitting in class with tons of students, loud talk when asking questions of explanation from teacher. Wow made my head go insane. Not even music helped me but I did it. I went there, did some math and went home.
I dislike math a lot but only have two more courses of this level of math and next is big big level of math that I have to do to be able to continue my studying to go from nurse assistant to preschool teacher. Big step.. no massive step actually.
Hopefully the math will go easier for me soon (it became easier for me last semester) because this math is hard. I try to count, try to understand my teacher but honestly, my brain has not returned from its vacation. But lets hope 😂🤞🏻
Anyway, how is your day going? my best friend asked me how school went and im sending her gifs with Ross from F.R.I.E.N.D.S when he say “I’m fine. I don’t know why it can out so loud and squeaky ” etc. No gym for me today. I’m actually gonna take a two days break (or maybe I go to the gym tomorrow. I don’t know) but one thing I do know is that I refuse school on my birthday 😅 a tradition for me since 5th grade.
much love ✨️