2026
-
› Happy New month!!
Happy March! I can’t believe that it’s already march! It’s insane! I hope this month will treat me better than what February did. I wish you all a wonderful month!
(oops I forgot the headline – 10.47pm)
thank god for filter. The dark circles under my eyes is a no joke. I really look like a raccoon.
I thought I would do a small little recap of February (of things I remember) just to have for fun something to look back at.
Personal; working on my mental health × have had ups and downs × still working on the medicines and trying to find the right one.
School; sock puppets × exams × me being/acting like a troublemaker (when we pretended to be toddlers in preschool) × painted my face with color during one of the classes × burned my fingers multiple times when crafting
February is a horrible month here in Sweden when it’s actually super common and “typical February” that many become sick. First me for a week and then my son for a week. So that haa been mostly our month. M has actually been sick as well so we all three has been ill.
Fun stuff; This month I have actually been with E a lot more. Laughs, talking crazy accents that took me days to come out from. Traveled to another town over the day to change location a bit. Eaten food at restaurant- well, a pizza shop. I always take burger and E takes kebab.
I have also been social training my son by going on a bus to a big supermarket. It went so, so well! So proud of him! Earlier I (still am) was nervous, scared, and anxious about trying to go out somewhere else with E due to the fact that I never knew when the explosion of emotions would happen. But these two times went super well! We also ate burgers at the pizza shop. He was so well-behaved. So proud! Sure, he tested me like any other child, but overall, I’m super proud!
That was a small little recap of my February. What is your recap?
The time is currently 10.45pm and I’m writing this in bed while listening to calm / soft music which normally makes me irritated etc but this Playlist is ok. Tomorrow is school and I hope I manage to get up in the morning to be able to go.
Alarm goes off in.. 6 hours ish.
So I’m going to say goodnight for now and thank you all so so much for sticking around, checking in, and showing love. ♡
Much love ❤️
-
› Chaos, paint on face, volcano and.. troublemaker
First day back after two weeks!
Oh my god, my head is tired! I went to school today for the first time after being home for two weeks, and it really takes on my energy and head. Don’t worry, the father had a day off from work, so he was home taking care of E.
Today we did a volcano that I have only seen in movies and series—a VOLCANO! Well, I didn’t participate in the design of making it, etc., but I participated today as a “teacher,” showing kindergarten kids what happens if you mix different ingredients, etc. I barely did any talking because I was focused on taking videos and pictures because it was so much fun! And something new!
When a group was giving their presentations, the rest of us had to pretend to be kindergarten children, and if you know me, I went ALL IN. Everyone was those quiet, non-troublemaker, so I was the loudest, troublemaker child. Haha!
Heck, I even painted on my face because some kids do that. I really went all in on the character.
Just a little bit of paint, and oh my god, the reaction my skin got after! Burning, itching, and awful. So when I came home, I cleaned it better (only used soap and water in school) with facial cleaning water and put moisturizer on.
Due to the bad lightning and me trying to fix the lightning of the picture, the black mooshed out paint doesn’t show.
Another group gave us assignments to make animals of toilet paper rolls, and I did a bat, but during lunch break I was bored, so I tried to make a spider and paint it. I will take a picture tomorrow if it. I didn’t finish any of them though, haha! I didn’t have time!
The third group had dancing, etc. We got to dance to different songs and try yoga positions, and oh my god, I now know I am old when my hip and arm hurt. Lol!
So; First making animals of paper rolls. Then our volcano experiment and last dance time.
This was my Monday. Crazy fun, but oh my, the energy is gone on me and the headache. No joke! Haha! But it was a fun day in school, but I realized that I have missed so many fun things they have done for these past two weeks.
I hope you all have / had a wonderful Monday!
Much love ♡
-
› Past two weeks has been crazy
school, flu, stomach bugs, studies on hold and still in new medicines trying stage.
So, I have been quiet. Reason; above. I have been home from school for two weeks now. First I had the flu and now son had stomach bug and flu on same time. He is still not 100% so I will probably keep him home next week as well.
School; before I became sick we had a theater with sockpuppets. We were three groups and everyone picked each story the teacher gave us as option. We could all have picked same but we all decided to do one of each.
My group did a skit about a child stealing a toy from another child who were playing with it. (All these stories were about solving conflicts between children in daycare/preschool). We were three in my group ~ I & D. I was the child who had the toy first and D was the teacher / mediator.. Me? I was the troublemaker. Haha! I said over and over again that I was gonna be that child.
Everyone in the class had these easy conflict-solving skills, and here I came with an attitude, making car sounds and playing around. Stealing the toy whenever the other children ( I) took it back or the teacher had it.
The class laughed because I REALLY lived into the character and my teacher laughed as well.
The week after the flu struck. I was completely knocked out the entire week. Luckily E wasn’t home for a few days, so I could recover and rest a bit. Saturday night, stomach flu struck. This time, on E and the day after, the flu. So it has been a crazy weekend plus week.
Studies are on hold due to me being knocked out and my son being super ill; I haven’t been able to study one single bit. Hopefully on Monday I can go back to school and I can start with my studies again.
Still in the trying-stage of new medicines.
Yeah, you read right, and like I have written several times, I’m keeping this blog raw and authentic.
I’m still in the trying stage, or whatever to actually call it. I have my dips and downs, but I’m working hard to get better. Slowly at the moment to not rush my head to a major massive crash.
Much love ♡
-
› Healing is active courage—showing up for yourself even when no one is clapping.
Healing isn’t about becoming someone new. It’s about returning to who you were before the world taught you to abandon yourself.
I am healing at a pace my nervous system can trust. I refuse to rush what took years to survive.
Working on myself both mentally and spiritually is the best decision I have taken. Healing myself from childhood traumas and sorrow, and for hurting myself for years, takes time.
I’m still alive! I have been physically exhausted and missed school this week’s Tuesday, but I’m now on my way to a city for a dentist appointment for E. A child dentist (pedodontist) who specializes in special needs kids.
I prefer sleeping, but the adult must adulting today. Lol!
-
› Wow I actually smashed it! I’m shocked!
First week of school for this semester and I have already smashed it! On a positive way.
Yes I cussed on the picture, therefor the blurred words. Sorry, but I am so happy!
I have been to school every day this week, and I am honestly proud of myself! Even today, with no sleep (when writing this post, I have been up for 30+ h. I don’t know why I haven’t been able to sleep.) but I smashed it.
This week we have had crafts on one class ~ make something (we had to think preschoolers) that they could tell us their feelings. Well, the class used papertowels rolls, some papers etc.. Me? I made an elephant in “3d”. First time I ever done one and honestly, I don’t like it. It’s not done yet though. It miss facial expressions etc.
I’m removing the black strings when they have helped me give shapes. And yes… It’s embarrassing, but hey, at least I did something else, and my teacher likes it. A lot. Ph, the clay thing next to it… I have also made that, but before holiday break. I didn’t have my tools, so it looks awful. Fun fact: I used to build and make a lot of things in clay and paint them. Roses, animals, statues, etc. I was so detailed on things, but sadly I lost interest in doing it, but I do kinda miss it.
Back to school week
Today I had an exam, and I smashed it. I got an A. 15 out of 17. One box was missed, so if I had answered that one (and not missed it), I would have had 16 out of 17 points instead. But it’s ok. I’m pretty ok with today’s result.
I have also sent assignments/essays to my teacher, so I’m actually a bit ahead of the class. Let’s hope that continues.
Slayed two makeup looks this week!
I am actually shocked! I have had two makeup looks in school this week, and I am so happy and proud of myself that I had that energy to do it. Making myself feel a little bit more alive when out in public. Lol! I will show pictures later, in an other post though
No sleep, yeah… I’m a walking zombie at the moment.
I couldn’t sleep. I had my usual things (sleeping pills, and no, I’m not ashamed of admitting that). After all, I’m keeping the blog raw and authentic, but they didn’t work. Why? I don’t know. So while I was awake, I studied, watched YouTube, did makeup, packed a bag, etc. Note that I was home alone, so I didn’t wake anyone up.
I pray to God I will be able to sleep tonight. I am so tired, but my brain is in full speed. Eyes are heavy, body aching. Feels like my body is about to collapse so let’s pray and hope that I will fall asleep tonight.
This weekend will test me if I don’t get any sleep. Studies, laundry, cleaning, cooking, household stuff, son being home (pray that he will be in good mood this weekend) and save the last makeup I have.
The makeup > E has currently ruined / destroyed a massive eyeshadow palette with neon colors that I finally started to use again. It makes me sad but, I’m not mad at him. Sure im said about my palette but im not mad. He is into makeup and that makes me happy, but I do wish he could stop use mine and use his own that I have for him. Yes. I have given my son eyeshadow palette of his own. One from my collection that I haven’t used. Daddy doesn’t approve but hey, im not judging and iam supporting my son to try new things so let’s go!
I’m actually going to wrap this post up for now, but I will be back soon. Much love, my beautiful souls 🤍