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› Hello Fall! Life Lately, Crutches, School & A Little Bit of Chaos
Fall is here, the leaves are dancing, the crutches are still following me around, and life is… well, life.
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Hello my beautiful pumpkins! 🎃🎃
Now it is officially fall! (I know I say it again, but honestly, fall is the best season according to me.)
I love the cold air, the color shift on the leaves, seeing them swirl, “dance” down and give their last performance!
I have been quiet for a bit, I know. The reason is that I really don’t have much to tell at the moment due to me being on crutches. Well, I’m supposed to use them, but as you all know me, I’m stubborn as hell. 😂 I used them in the beginning, but now I’m fighting through the pain because I don’t want to need them anymore.
I still bring them with me if I go out — to the city, for example — in case the pain gets unbearable and I need a bit of “pain relief.”
So, what’s up with you? Any updates?
For me? Nothing really.
• Voted in the election — meaning, I did my duty as a Swedish citizen. 🇸🇪
• Slowly stopping one medication to introduce another one over time.
• Not amputated my foot — miracle.
• Studied.
• Had a fever last week, so no school for me.
• Had a birthday dinner date with my Queen Alien — my best friend. Yeah, I know, she’s my cousin, but that is so weird to write/say, so I will not mention that again. 🥲
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› Back to School on Crutches | A Little EverFlow Life Update
Hello my spicy and beautiful pumpkins! 🖤 How are you all? “Long time” no seen.
I am truly exhausted — both mentally and physically!
Jumping on crutches is a pure workout and I am NOT built for workouts. Give me cookies and milk and I will be a happy person. Lol.
Anyway…
The reason why I have been absent is because I have been mentally preparing and struggling with school — yes, I know. Shit happens and I hate it there, but I do it for my son. Not only for him to have after-school care, but also to show him that it’s okay if you don’t graduate high school. You can always get an education later in life.
Monday: First day. Not prepared. Read here; [ link to Monday’s post ]
Tuesday: Went to school for like 1.5 hours. I couldn’t stay for a whole day. I was almost falling asleep in class, couldn’t focus and had a migraine on top of that. I hadn’t slept that night because of massive stomach pain that kept waking me up every 30 minutes. It was awful, and it kept going nonstop the whole Wednesday as well.
Friday [today]: Half day — woho! Love that!
Today we had a test — yes, a test already… first week — and I passed it. Woop!
We also had a “roleplay” where the teacher divided us students into two groups — four in each. We had to do a roleplay where two of the students were preschool kids and two had to be the teachers. One mean teacher and one “good” teacher.
Guess which one I was?
……….. *pause for guessing* ………..
If you guessed the mean one, you are correct!
So me “yelling” and being mean to one of the children — I went all out. I was acting like this horrible, mean teacher.
Wow! Almost so good that I deserve an Oscar!
That’s how good I was. 😂
After school,
I came home, supposed to do homework, but honestly — all my energy went into going to school and jumping around on crutches. My hands and arms are actually hurting from it, to be honest. It is brutal! I don’t understand how people can do it day in and day out to be honest! You guys are strong!
At least I’m going, which is a miracle for me.
Sure, I get a lot of stares, but I’m rocking those screaming, insanely blue crutches.
They are so ugly! It’s ridiculous.
Tomorrow I will study. I had to do paperwork for the insurance company, Lufthansa and their bullshit and yeah…
Exhausted Miima for sure!
So here is a quick post, quick check-in.
Hi! Here I am! Exhausted but still alive — barely — and ready to post again. Getting back to my routines again!
Thank you so, so much for checking in on EverFlow and for being patient with me. I really appreciate you! SO MUCH! 🖤
Much love to you, my pumpkins! 🖤 -
› Life Lately | A Little EverFlow Update From Home
A little look at everyday life, social training, motherhood, getting around on crutches, and dealing with an injured foot.
Hello my spicy pumpkins! 🖤
🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃
How are you all doing today? I hope you all have an amazing day / evening!
I thought I should post a mixed blog post with a bit of what I’ve been doing lately when I haven’t been blogging. Mostly photos though. A picture say more than a thousand words – isn’t that the saying?
E and I have been social training a couple of times — at the same time as we’ve been grocery shopping, but these times have been in town. Not at home. So it has been a lot of bus rides and walking. Shopping, spending time together, laughs, happiness but of course tears and sadness. Nothing special has happened with the sadness, but you can’t always have bright, colorful and happy days.
Alone on the bus. Take which ever the seat you want. 
Telling him to slow down and go next to me is impossible.
Trying to keep up with the same speed as E when walking — that must look interesting and funny. Screaming blue crutches, a heffalump (me) dressed in black and probably with a backpack as usual. Even the thought of that makes me laugh! Like… what!?Do you know the boy who copies and making fun of his mom when walking? Little boy!
Thief. Always steal my extra legs. Haha!
I thought I’d share some photos from the time. I’m currently in bed, resting my foot, neck and stomach. Stomach pain after today’s visit to the hospital.
Update on my foot: 8/10 pain right now.Ice Cream Date
Random pics from the time.
Broken adapter.. I accidentally dropped it on the floor. Now I know how an adapter for phonecharger looks like inside. 
I need these as tattoos. -
› What I Wish I Knew During My Darkest Depression
Have you ever had the thought, “If I could go back in time, what would I tell my younger self?”
For me… honestly, this post will be 1000% raw and authentic. The truth will be told here.
⚠️ Warning: mentions ofsuicide and self-harm ⚠️
If I’m being honest, I wish I could go back to the time when I was at my deepest depression — when I harmed myself badly, wrote goodbye letters to my mum, and tried so many times to end my life.
I wish I could go back in time and tell my mum not to worry — that I wouldn’t do it. Back when I slept with kitchen knives (not the ones you eat with) under my pillow.
Depression made me awful to my mum. Me harming myself hurt her deeply. I was awful to my siblings too, who dropped everything the second they noticed I was gone. My brother drove back and forth looking for me. My siblings ran around calling my name, trying to find me, terrorized by the calls and the fear of not knowing where I was.
If I could turn back time and know what I know today, I would have stopped.
I would have told younger Emma (yes, that’s my name, but I go by Mii):
Don’t do it. It’s not worth it. You will have your own family one day. You need to stay strong so you can be there for them — and for mum when she gets older.
Or maybe just a few simple words:
It’s not worth it.
Sorry for such a deep conversation, but I wanted you to know a little bit of my background before sharing what I would have said to my younger self.What would you have told your younger self?
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› One Week Later… Recovery Isn’t Going as Planned
Happy Monday! 🖤
New week!
New possibilities!
New goals!
One week ago, I was on my way back from Niš, Serbia. It’s crazy how fast time flies!
I still haven’t gone through the photos from my camera, so I can edit them and show you all. The unexpected detour to the emergency room, along with the pain, has my full attention right now. Yep… I’m still dealing with the pain with no painkillers or anything.
I have a few people waiting for their photos, so I’m going to try to sort everything out either tonight or tomorrow.
I just wanted to pop in and wish you all a wonderful week! 🖤
I’ll be back on The EVERFLOW as soon as possible, but right now my main focus is simply trying not to break down because of the pain.
The difference is.. *chefs kiss*
Much love to you, my pumpkins. 🎃🖤