I need to stop with positivity

Why is life so unfair?

Today I left school crying. Tears falling down my cheeks like Niagara Falls. I’m broken. Heartbroken. When finally something good happens in my life, its always something that will go wrong.

Seven months left. That is all. Seven months and I would be done with my education.  Unfortunately it ended today. Why? Because of the internship I was supposed to have in two weeks.

Let me take it from start;  I have been in contact with my supervisor ONCE (per email. One answer from her)  and I got the schedule for my times at the internship which I had to message back, explaining about E, his autism diagnosis,  school situation etc with him. I thought we would be able to work things out.. Like it has been done on all other places I have had internships at.

Then my teacher got an email in class so she came up to me and read it. They will not be able to adjust the schedule and said a lot more. This broke me. The teacher left the class after a short amount of time (well, pretty much instantly after she read the message) and I could feel how close my tears was..

So I packed my stuff and left. I went home. I called Michaela and cried!

Note that the supervisor has NOT messaged me anything about this.

I really wanted this. I really wanted to be able to work with special need children and later on study to become a preschool teacher.

But if I don’t have an internship at a preschool, I will automatically fail and therefore they will kick me out. I can’t continue.

So Sadly, my education ends today unless a freaking miracle happen.

So I think from now on, I need to stop with thinking positive about things, stuff, happenings etc. Because when ever something good happens to me, something will always knock me down and ruin things.

Anyway, rant over. I’m going to bed. Hopefully I can get some sleep. Due to all emotions, etc., today, I fell asleep when I came home, and I know that will mess up my sleep tonight, so let’s hope. Haha!