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› 32 Hours Awake: Sleep Deprivation, Parenting & Pure Survival Mode
32+ hours awake, one overenergized child, zero brain cells, and caffeine as a personality trait. Welcome to survival mode. 😄🖤💀
Guess what? I still haven’t gotten any sleep.
It’s currently 5 PM, and I can honestly say: I A M D E A D.
Not literally, but you get what I mean.
My son is still all over the place, full of energy, and I’m honestly jealous. If I had even one percent of his energy, I’d be happy.
Headache ✅
Sound sensitive ✅
Light sensitive ✅
I was hoping I’d at least get a nap during the day, but with my luck… I doubt it.
I need to keep E awake for the rest of the day, otherwise I’ll probably have another night like this, and my body and mental health honestly can’t handle that.
So here we go 😵💫 A few more hours to survive.
I’m praying he sleeps tonight because I have a super important meeting tomorrow that I absolutely need to attend.
I’ve officially been awake for 32 hours and 30 minutes… and I definitely feel it.How’s your day?
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› Our Son Had His Own Graduation
Today is not a regular day because today it was my son’s end-of-the-school year celebration.
Swedish flag in the wind.
We went to his school to see the “graduation”. Was waiting for them to come walking and start the singing..until a mother or if it was an assistant or teacher, came up to me “Are you E’s mom?” I answered yes and she told me that my son’s class was having their singing somewhere else.
I got very irritated to be honest, because this has made us miss 10 minutes of his singing. I told M where they were so we went there.
None of us had gotten the information about this. We thought they were gonna celebrate at their regular location, no they had changed location!
So unfortunately we missed 10 minutes but we attended for the rest. Unfortunately we had to hide (mostly me) because E would have left the classes and their performance to run up to me. I saw a little bit of it.
He was so good! He attended the whole performance with the class. Sure, when they were was switching songs (the teachers use signs and signlanguage to show and tell which song was next) we heard E sing randomly “Keep going but be supersneaky” < another type of Baby Shark and so many other songs. I laughed.Our son had his own graduation.
It was wonderful to see and hear him participate in every event.
I love E and how funny he is. Parents were laughing as well. Imagine, all quiet location, before sign languages etc and speak started, all you could hear was my son singing baby shark.●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●
Car selfie. *filter* After the graduation of our son, M and I left (E was gonna stay in school to have an end-of-school year with his class), we decided to go to the foodstore. Todays dinner; Indian food and rice.
Snapshots of today
Random silhouette 
To my son “You are the best!” 
Meat, bananas and leverpastej 
CARSELFIE -
› The Hug I Really Needed
I Went Into Town Angry and Came Home Almost Crying
Am I losing it? My mind?
I made the decision to not continue school because of everything that happened. I told the teacher. I told my classmates. And still, she sends out the next semester schedule and information about what books we need.
Like… why?
So now it has me thinking. Even though it would be a financial struggle for me, maybe I should continue after all.
Why?
Well… partly because I honestly want to piss the teacher and principal off. Yes, I am petty. I know that. But after everything they put me through, can you really blame me?
But there is another reason too.
If I do not have school or a job and I am home during after-school hours, my son will lose his after-school care placement even though he genuinely needs it for his social development, routines, and support.
So I am stuck in a really difficult situation right now.
Because the truth is: I *do* want this education. You all know that. But at the same time, the principal, the internship, and the teacher completely killed my sparkle for it.
And honestly? Staying home all day would probably mess up my head too.
Speaking of the internship…
Today when I went into town for a meeting, I got the biggest hug.
I was walking between the coffee shop windows and the small bus station when I suddenly heard knocking on the glass. So I turned around and there she was — a mom I used to work with — smiling and pointing toward a child inside the café.
The SECOND that little girl saw me, she started jumping up and down.
I rushed inside immediately.
And oh my God 😭
The second I got through the doors, she came RUNNING toward me so fast that I barely had time to lean down before she literally flew up onto me and wrapped herself around me like a tiny octopus.
She did NOT want to let go.
I have not seen her since my internship ended, so seeing her again honestly hit me right in the heart.
Then her mom told me something that almost made me cry right there in the café.
Apparently, this little girl asks almost every single day:
“Where is Emma? Is Emma coming?”
That completely broke my heart.
So I explained to her mom what actually happened during my internship and how I had been treated. Let us just say… she got MAD. Like genuinely angry on my behalf.
Meanwhile, my little octopus was still clinging onto me 😭
Unfortunately, we eventually had to separate because I had a meeting to get to and she was there with her mom and friends.
But wow…
I really needed that hug more than I realized.
Me and this child connected instantly from my very first day there (not the child connected to the accusations before anyone starts wondering), and seeing her again honestly made me remember why I loved this in the first place.
A small hug really can make the world feel softer sometimes.
And today, I really needed that softness.So this had me thinking as well.
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› It’s Secured & There’s No Risk of Running Out!
It’s secured. No risk of me going without it. It was expensive, but it was on sale — half price compared to its normal price.
Hey guys! I hope you are all doing well today! I have not said that in a long time. I’M SORRY!! How are you? How have you been? Any news you want to share? Talk to me 🥰 Let’s have a conversation in the comments!
It’s a cardigan I tied around my bag
Now to the post — and you are probably wondering what I mean by the title.
Well, first things first: I did not go to the BS event the teacher sent an invitation to. Nope.
Second: the Pepsi Max is secured 🙌🏼
Yes, I went into town just to buy Pepsi Max, and then I remembered that my son had been pointing at chips in the advertisement papers, so I bought those too. I also picked up my new obsession (well… not new, but new for this use): vanilla protein drinks that I have started using in my smoothies alongside the powder and oh my God… game changer 🙌🏼
It’s moments like this I wish I had a car 😅 Let me tell you, this was heavy! But it was secured! So getting home was a challenge. Sun high up in sky, massive head, a bag on wheels, backpack and a shopping bag with all the Pepsi Max plus the other. Heavy!
Sadly, I still had to go to the grocery store after I got home and dropped the Pepsi Max off because I needed to buy dinner and breakfast stuff.
Today I spent around $70 😵💫 Mostly on soda, but it is fine. They do not have this sale very often, so whenever they do… I attack the packages 😂
Well, not literally. But you get it.Todays dinner; my own chicken buttermasala and rice. Plus veggies ofcourse.
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› A Weekend in Snapshots
Let’s try to make a weekend recap every weekend. It might be difficult, but I’ll try. It would actually be fun to look back and see what I’ve been doing. Lol!
This weekend (July 5–7th, 2026) has not been anything special. Sweden’s National Day was yesterday, so E and I had meat, fries, and of course, veggies!
Long story short — my weekend in a few words:
Laundry ● Grocery shopping ● Soap bubbles ● Football in the basement hallways ● Migraine ● Sweden’s National Day ● Trying a new smoothie recipe ● Home spa
Grocery shopping: expensive as hell (sorry!) — $80 for THIS. < Link
Friday: meetings and snapshots of random things.
Saturday: playing football with E in the hallways in the basement. Oh man… We played for so long while waiting for each load of laundry. – spa night at home.
Sunday / Today: a chill-ish day. I played with M and basement football again, but sadly I had to leave for a while while M stayed home because I had a massive migraine. (I still have it, but it has calmed down a little so I can at least write this.)
And yes… grocery shopping again today—$70. WHY!? On what!? Just the watermelon alone cost me $12.
Other things I did this weekend: I finally had a little spa night. Face masks, cleansing, serums, moisturizer—the whole shebang, felt so good. Honestly, I do not remember the last time I did that, but it has been a long time.
Smoothie talk! Normally I make smoothies with frozen berries and milk (plus protein powder), but after a few minutes it always turns into some weird mug cake texture if I do not drink it immediately. So I Googled different ideas and found one saying to defrost the berries first and use water with just a little milk.
I tried that—except I used a vanilla milkshake protein shake instead of milk—and oh my God… it was delicious. And thick!
Raspberries, mangoes, and strawberries with a vanilla milkshake protein shake (sugar-free).
10/10 honestly.This is pretty much a little bit of my weekend. Nothing fancy or entertaining – haha!